Escaping the Comparison Trap
Have you caught yourself comparing yourself to others recently? Maybe you were scrolling through social media or minding your own business at the grocery store when suddenly it happened. You notice someone that appears to be in a place in their life that you would like to be, and the comparison starts.
Nine times out of ten, you end up on the negative end of the comparison. Somehow you aren’t measuring up the way that they are. You start to question whether there’s something wrong with you or what you’re doing wrong. It happens suddenly, and then that wave of insecurity hits. Studies show that 90% of women view themselves negatively compared to other women.
This episode will show why the comparison trap is never helpful and how to break out of it. There’s no reason to compare yourself to others and make yourself feel less than. It’s time to catch yourself when the comparisons begin. You can control your thoughts. It’s time to focus on all of the good and abundance that we all have. It’s time to take back our thoughts and be the dangerous women we are.
[02:32] Why do we compare ourselves to others? It's a natural tendency. By comparing ourselves to others we're actually getting information. We're looking to others or the mouse has to tell us how we're supposed to think, act, feel, or believe.
[04:02] Comparing yourself to another person is a no-win situation. You can only base that comparison on the part of that person's life that you have access to.
[05:59] Social media and Instagram are just one big highlight reel. These platforms aren't showing you the parts of people's lives that don't feel good.
[07:00] The flip side of underestimating yourself is over-exaggerating who you are. These thoughts foster a place of jealousy and envy that comes from a place of scarcity and lack. Underlying lack and scarcity can push us to a place of judgment.
[08:17] Have you ever looked at someone and thought they were doing too much? This could be a trigger that you're not doing enough. This is really a distraction from the thoughts that you think about yourself.
[09:22] How does it make you feel when you compare yourself to other people? What emotions does it bring up? What actions do you take or not take?
[10:10] Catch yourself when you notice that you're going down the comparison route. Stop and shift your focus. You control your thoughts. Find something positive that you are doing now.
[10:51] Face the facts. Comparison is a game that you won't win. Someone else being beautiful or successful does not negate your beauty or success.
[12:52] When I see someone winning I allow it. I don't do things from a place of envy. To be a dangerous woman, we have to allow our feelings while not responding and reacting to them. Especially, when it causes us to act out of alignment with who we are and who we are becoming.
[13:36] Validate why your success is next by pulling out your successes and all your growth and potential. What would you do if you truly believed that you were next and you didn't have to compete with anyone?
[14:48] Come up with a list of things that you are proud of achieving. Come up with a list of things that you're grateful for. Be grateful for what you have now. Be in abundance.
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